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A few months back I matched with a couple on Feeld. The app, as you might have guessed, is essentially Tinder for couples and singles seeking group sex. In a previous relationship, my girlfriend and I had a couples profile. We opted for a free trial of the paid version, which allowed us to see who swiped yes already. In less than a day, there were literally one thousand single men had.
Competition is fierce for single men in the swinging world. And having been on the other side as a couple, I’ve seen guys who look like they belong on the cover of Men’s Fitness. The reverse, however, is also true. There are plenty of people who should be content that one person wants to fuck them, let alone two.
And though it may now be more accepted than it once was, swinging is still a very niche community. Which means there aren’t many fish in the proverbial sea. On Tinder, I could spend ten days swiping through potential matches. With Feeld, it’s about ten minutes. The term “unicorn” is used by couples to define the elusive bisexual, single woman. Likewise, I’ve begun calling hot couples looking for single males black swans. Sure they exist, but not with any sort of regularity.
A few months back, I opened the app and swiped right on a handful of new profiles. I instantly matched with a couple who called themselves P&A. It’s quite common to use fake names or initials to maintain discretion. (And for the record, names in my stories are always changed or that very reason).
P&A were in their early 30s and had just moved out to Los Angeles from the east coast. “A” worked in the same industry as me, and “P” was a stunning brunette with c-cups and, due to her teaching yoga, had a ridiculously hot body. One she was all too proud to show off in a few photos they snapped at Burning Man. In the swingers community, Burning Man photos are the couples equivalent of women posing with sleeping tigers. After a brief exchange, they revealed their names as Patricia and Adam. And as luck would have it, they were literally driving back from Burning Man that very moment.
Since Adam was busy driving, Patricia requested I giver her a much needed distraction from the long car ride. We began talking about their past sexual experiences.
Me: So what types of play do you guys normally enjoy with another guy in the mix?
Patricia: I like all hands/mouths and dicks on deck… lol.
Patricia: I love stuffing two cocks in my mouth, stroking them simultaneously and having you both cum on me at the same time.
Patricia: Sensual, a little bit rough and collaborative is key.
As things got more sexual, she sent me a few nude photos Adam had taken. They were of Patricia posing on a porch overlooking an open field. I pushed up my lower jaw with the bottom of my hand.
She asked to see my body and cock, so I forwarded some artistic black and white photos my ex and I had snapped together and put on a Tumblr page. Lighting, composition, and the presence of a female touch can really bring out of the David LaChappelle in a dick pic.
Patricia: Very hot. Adam is barely driving in a straight line.
I sent a few her a few more.
Patricia: Sexy. I’m going to have to dig into some photos for you when I get home. Me: You should take a naughty road selfie.
While Adam continued to drive, she sent a photo of her gripping Adam’s hard cock through his fly. He was really going to have a difficult time driving straight now.
Patricia: The driver enjoying his special treatment 😉
I didn’t want to be responsible for a car accident, but I couldn’t help myself.
Me: I think you better cover that up with your mouth. He’ll get sunburned.
I sent her another photo of just me holding my cock this time.
Patricia: Wish my mouth was a lot closer to it 😉
Patricia: So this just happened…
She sent me a video. I could see the thumbnail freeze frame, but I couldn’t hit play just yet. I forgot to mention I was at work during this entire exchange. I looked around, everyone seemed busy. I unplugged my headphones from my laptop and slid them into my phone. I lowered the sound for good measure.
When I pressed play, her panties were pulled to the side, and Adam was fingering her dripping wet pussy. She was moaning like Brazzers was signing her paychecks. Thank god I turned down the volume.
When the 30 second clip was over, I had a dumb grin on my face and a hard cock in my jeans. I can only imagine what my coworkers would’ve thought had they known what was happening just a few feet away.
Me: I think you should just drive straight over to my place. 💦
Patricia: I can’t believe he made me cum while driving
Me: He’s making the rest of us look bad! 😂
Patricia: I cleaned his fingers after he made me cum in the car
She sent a second video. This time, true to her word, she was licking her juices off Adam’s fingers. I’m not sure I could’ve been more turned on. We exchanged more dirty talk then made plans to meet at a bar close to their place that Saturday.
While I enjoyed being the third with other couples, I also remained open to finding a girlfriend. Preferably one who’s more kinky and open to group play. For that reason, I had a few profiles on various ‘normal dating’ apps. I always made sure to mention in the bio that I’m on the more open-minded with some coy innuendo. Better to be up-front and rejected quickly than go on a few dates and find no sexual compatibility, I thought.
When Saturday rolled around, a woman named Lilly messaged me on Bumble. She was a beautiful Midwestern soul with bleach blonde California hair. We made small talk, and it just so happened she lived in the same neighborhood as Patricia and Adam. We talked for a bit more before she informed me about an unfortunate accident she had a few months prior. Lilly had badly sliced her top lip and knocked a few teeth out from a slip and fall. Her teeth were fixed and her lip now healed, but the recovery took months. Though there was still slight scarring, she was able to cover it with makeup and was finally feeling confident enough to have sex again. Lilly mentioned it had been a long drought for her, and she was feeling very horny. I got the distinct impression she was interested in exploring just how deep the rabbit hole went.
Admittedly, this was a complete outlier. Most women in my experience are typically never this candid about wanting to have sex within the first twenty minutes of matching. If they are, my catfish alarm goes off like crazy and for good reason. This was a wholly unique situation, however. A quick LinkedIn search of her first name and listed company, and I was apt to believe Lilly was indeed real.
Since Lilly lived in the same area as Patricia and Adam, I figured if things didn’t go well over drinks, I could reach out and meet up with Lilly. I told her I was meeting friends for drinks, and that I’d text her later. I made no mention these friends were a couple I met up a sex app, however. Best not to bring up those details until they’re germane to the discussion, I thought.
A little bit later, I met up with Patricia and Adam. They were friendly and personable, and we hit it off instantly. During our conversation, my phone kept vibrating with text message notifications. Six or seven in a row. Believing it to be an emergency, I politely excused myself to go to the bathroom. But even without this, I always like to give the couple a few minutes to talk alone and decide if they want to take the next step with me. I walked into the bathroom stall and took out my phone. All of the messages from Lilly.
What the fuck?
I unlocked my phone and opened our conversation. Waiting for me were two mirror shots of Lilly standing in her walk-in closet. They were cropped from the neck down, dress around her waist, displaying her absolutely perfect Double D’s. And from the looks of their perfectly round shape, she paid top dollar for them. I scrolled up to a third photo which showed off her bubbly ass in a black g-string. If she was being forward before, she wanted to leave absolutely no doubt about her intentions now.
Lilly: I had a few drinks and I’m horny. Wanna come over?
Every guy can relate to sadistic nature which makes up the fabric of our universe. Often times, men will go days, weeks, or even months, without so much as an accidental brush-up from a woman. Then, in some cruel twist of fate, we’ll have two multiple parties interested at the exact same time, and we’ll be forced into some kind of sexual Sophie’s choice. Choosing to hang with the woman behind door one will piss off the woman behind door two. Then, almost inevitably, something unforeseen happens and door one is no longer available. Now neither is an option, and PornHub is the only respite.
This happened many times before, and I’d almost come to anticipate it now. After many failed experiences in the past, I found the best tactic was to hold out on making a decision for as long as possible. Then, when the chips are down, always choose probability over potential. The grass may be greener on the other side, but a bird in the hand is worth two in the well-shaven bush.
I texted Lilly back, complimenting her body as well as her photography skills. I let her know that I was still out having drinks and would text her back shortly. It would be rude, after all, to text while I was in the company of friends. Stall officially deployed.
Once I returned to the table, Adam informed me that he’d paid for the drinks, and I was welcome to join them back at their place. I accepted the invitation and gave myself a mental high-five for playing it correctly.
During the walk back, Lilly texted me a few more times. I checked my phone a few times, and they finally asked who was hitting me up so much. Feeling comfortable enough now, I informed them we’d matched on Bumble earlier, and she’d been sexting me while we were having drinks.
Patricia: Can I see what she looks like?
I showed her Lilly’s Bumble profile but didn’t share her nude photos out of respect for Lilly’s privacy. Patricia was smitten.
Patricia: Oooooh, where does she live?
Me: Not far from here, actually.
Patricia: You want to ask if she wants to join us?
I’ll be honest, the thought didn’t cross my mind until she mentioned it. Mostly because I didn’t want to seem rude after we’d spent the past several days discussing our potential threesome. I also had my doubts whether a woman, one whom I’d only matched mere hours before, would be up for a first meeting foursome. Though she might’ve been up for a one-on-one thing, mentioning group sex thing might’ve repelled her altogether.
Adam: You don’t have to. Patricia just loves eating pussy.
Patricia playfully slapped him in the arm.
When you’re already playing with house money, sometimes you have to double down.
Me: You know what? Why not?
I texted Lilly and told her I was having drinks with a couple at a nearby apartment, and that she was more than welcome to join. She said yes to my, and our, pleasant surprise. I sent Lilly the address, and she responded that she’d be over soon. To be clear, I mentioned nothing about the exact nature of our hangout or how we’d all met. For the rest of the walk, the three of us brainstormed just how, exactly, we were going to broach the subject of that very topic. If we’re too direct, she might get freak out, and I’d lose any future chance.
Adam: Don’t worry. I’ll handle it.
Patricia: Oh, so you’re the expert, huh?
Adam: I seduced you, didn’t I?
Once we got to their apartment, our gracious hostess poured a few glasses of whisky for Adam and I. While we waited for Lilly to show, the three of us talked music, work, and, of course, Burning Man.
Twenty minutes later, the doorbell rang. We decided I should be the one to greet her. I opened the door and gave Lilly a hug like we were already old friends. She squeezed back.
Patricia offered to pour her a drink, and Lilly requested red wine. She then joined Adam and I on the giant L-shaped couch. Patricia handed her a glass filled near to the brim, and the three of us continued to make small talk.
Lilly: So how do you guys all know each other?
Heeeeere we goooo…
Patricia and I looked to Adam.
Adam: We met on Feeld. Have you heard of it?
That’s the big plan?
Lilly: I haven’t, no.
Adam: Oh, well it’s an app where couples can meet to have threesomes and foursomes.
Adam bomb officially dropped. So much for subtlety in seduction.
She looked over at me for confirmation. I nodded sheepishly like a child caught drawing on the walls with crayon.
Lilly: Sounds like fun.
Patricia pounced on the opening.
Patricia: Let’s play a game.
Lilly: Like what?
Patricia: Truth or dare.
Even in our 20s/30s, this was the go-to ice breaker for adults experienced in group play. The first few rounds were all truth but naturally gravitated toward questions about sex: favorite positions, craziest places to have it, etc. Then it was Lilly’s turn. She chose me. It was time to push the boundaries and be the first ‘victim.’
Lilly: I dare you to take off your clothes.
There was literally no hesitation. I was not even close to erect at this point in the game. And as a self-proclaimed grower, I was about to strip naked in a room full of strangers while everyone was fully dressed. The stuff of nightmares. I did my best sexy strip tease but don’t anticipate they’ll cast me in a Magic Mike sequel. Finally I was down to my boxers and dropped trou for the room to see.
The tone in her voice suggested it was a compliment of my metaphorical, and not literal, balls. Now it was Adam’s turn. He chose Lilly. She chose dare.
Adam: I dare you three to triple kiss.
Though I’d had a few group experiences, I’d never had a triple kiss. It was more of an MTV Real World childhood fantasy than practical means of foreplay. We brought our heads together and our tongues met in a triumvirate of hedonism. It was my turn. I chose Patricia. She chose dare.
Me: I dare you to suck on Lilly’s nipples.
A huge smile spread across her face. She was absolutely giddy. Lilly lifted her shirt and bra, and Patricia got her money’s worth. Patricia then got down between her legs and gave her clit a brief kiss. At this point, I was getting very turned on. And I think Patricia noticed because she immediately dared Lilly to give me a blowjob on the next turn.
Lilly got down on her knees and slowly started working my shaft with the tip of her tongue. She teased and kissed the head of my cock. She had impressive patience for having waited months for an opportunity. Soon she was going all out.
There’s nothing sexier than sheer enthusiasm. After a few minutes, Patricia took over for her. Adam decided to get in on the action and grabbed Lilly by the hand. I watched Patricia deep throat me with surprising ease. I couldn’t recall any previous partner being able to do so. It took every fiber of my being to maintain my composure. When I looked back to my right, Adam had Lilly bent over on all fours and was fucking her from behind.
From there, it became a blur of bodies. I went down on Patricia and began sucking her swollen clit while she watched Lilly ride cowgirl on top of Adam. Adam and I switched partners. Lilly began sucking my cock while I rubbed her clit and fingered her g-spot. She was absolutely soaking wet and looked up at me with my cock in her mouth.
Lilly: I want you to fuck me.
She rolled over on her stomach and swayed her ass in the air, inviting me inside. I nearly climaxed at the sight. I took a pause to recover then pushed inside her tight, pink pussy. As I got all the way inside, she made a little whimper.
I concentrated on my breathing, so I could last long enough that we could both cum. I looked right to see Patricia and Adam having sex in that close, passionate way that couples do. Meanwhile, Lilly and I fucked like two caged, horny animals. I spanked her ass, and she yelped. Whether it was pleasure or pain, she wanted more. I spanked her other cheek to even out the redness.
Adam and Patricia must’ve been inspired by our performance because soon they began to fuck a bit rougher. At some point, one of them must’ve grabbed a Magic Wand vibrator. Patricia was holding it against her clit while Adam thrust his thick cock in and out of her. Patricia began shaking uncontrollably and came so loudly I worried the neighbors might call the police.
Patricia: Cum on my face.
Adam pulled out and did as she demanded. She kept her eyes closed as spurt after spurt of Adam’s cum hit her lips, cheeks, and chin. It dripped all the way down to her tits. She licked her lips, laughed, then ran to the bathroom to clean up. This sight put Lilly and I over the edge. Her entire body went limp when she came. She requested something far less messy than Patricia.
Lilly: I want to swallow you.
I pulled out, and Lilly flipped over. She circled her mouth around the top of my shaft and held it on there. My cock twitched as hours of buildup were released in seconds. Lilly kept her mouth sealed around my cock, running her hand along the base until every drop of cum was drained. Then, she swallowed it all at once.
Lilly: That was fun.
Me: Yes it was.
I am not the smoothest of talkers during the post-coital glow.
The living room was littered with discarded clothes, half-empty glasses, and ripped condom wrappers. Lilly and I got dressed and helped Adam clean. Things were shockingly normal between the three of us, as if tidying up after a Super Bowl party. I couldn’t help but think that only a few hours previous we were all complete strangers.
Lilly and I said goodbye to Adam, but missed Patricia because she was showering off. Lilly and I walked downstairs and waited for her Uber to arrive.
Me: So when we matched earlier, did you think anything like this would’ve happened?
Lilly: Definitely not.
When the car rolled up, I kissed Lilly goodnight and made the walk back to my car. I thought of Patricia, Adam, and Lily. I thought of being an old man and reminiscing about nights like these. I thought of how strange and wonderful the internet can be.